Wednesday, July 09, 2008

I knew it would happen

I have tried to raise my son with no clear cut gender roles or rules. He can play with whatever toy he wants, have whatever sheets he wants, and wear whatever clothes he wants (with in reason, he can have girls socks outside of the house, but nighties at home, as I know people are judgemental, especially to lesbians raising boys). The only difference we have told him is the boys have a penis and girls have a vagina. The result was a toddler and preschooler who loves to play with plastic food, playdough, spiderman, dolls and cars. He loves his Dora sheets with Barney pillow cases. He loves his superhero t-shirts and wears and nightie instead of pjs. But, I knew it wouldn't last and the real world would seep in. When he plays with Sadie she is always the princess, his role is ever changing, but never the princess, because he says girls are princesses. He just gave me one his stickers yesterday because it was pink and told me pink is for girls and blue is for boys. Sigh. But, he hasn't morphed into a full fledged macho man. He still loves his plastic food, and chooses the toys at McDonald's based on which one looks fun. But, instead of just saying "I want toy A or B". He know says "Give me the girl toy or the boy toy". Hopefully, I have given him the building blocks, to keep an open mind on what is "girl" and "boy" and continue to enjoy whatever he likes and not feel confined to what is "boy".

2 comments:

bleu said...

I always felt the same and always made sure not to engender Bliss. he wore dresses he picked when he was little for a time and loved all colors. Then one day he says he won't wear a ponytail anymore because they are for girls. Even though many of our male friends wear ponytails. Then one day he says only a girl marries a boy or a boy marries a girl. I lost it inside but calmly explained how that was very not true. It breaks my heart, and he has never even been to a daycare or preschool class, it just seeps in. He still wears long hair though, thank goddess.

Becky Le Cochon said...

i will miss you on BBC...but glad we still have blogland!!! :-)